Fish Beware

Fish Beware
February 3, 2010

Just got my Spring Bass Pro Shop catalog today. Went to the Nashville Fishing and Boat Show Expo this past Sunday. Recent magazines, Bassmaster, Bassin' and BassWest read in the last 30 days. I have to admit, I began to feel a little sorry for the basses beginning in the late Winter, Spring, Summer and Fall of 2010. There are new, field tested, slightly proven new baits coming into the hands of unsuspecting fishermen, you know those folks who always buy the latest greatest but still don't seem to catch more fish except on their favorite worm, spinnerbait, etc. Well this year is different. There is an onslaught of new crankbaits with highly technical weight and rattle systems, precise depth control (if you use the exact pound test super fluorocarbon line) with special rounded or square or coffin (coffin?)shaped bills not to mention custom super realistic hologramic (ok, I made that up) paint jobs. Obviously anyone will be able to catch limit after limit on any crankbait that has the name Sexy in it. In fact, every model that Strike Queen offers has a "sexy shad" model. Also insinuating itself into all lure makers collection is the segmented crankbait. The more segments, the better the action, the more and bigger fish you catch. And while I am on this subject let me remind you that your unqualified success is practically guaranteed if you spend double figures for your crankbaits. Lucy Craft discovered that fishermen will plunk down $15 for a $4 crankbait if you paint it well and import it from Japan. And Swimbaits, well that's a whole 'nother category of pricing entirely

What mystifies me is the leadhead jig. How there can be so many "can't miss" shapes and classes of a simple piece of lead molded to a hook with a plastic skirt, I will never understand. However talk to any jig zenmeister and he can tell you that his favorite jig turns precisely in a bass's mouth so that it only hooks him in the top, left side of his lip. Flipping jigs, swimming jigs, casting jigs, football jigs, finesse jigs, pro-model jigs, pigskin jigs, rattling jig, brush jigs, mop jigs. are we fishermen nuts or what? And I am not going into jig trailers, craws, double tail, chunks, rage tails, creature baits, most with the name hog in it and beaver baits.

Plastics, what can I say. Remember the old creme worms with a 2-3 hook harness and tiny propeller (I guess predecessor to the helicopter lure). Sure caught lots of fish. Now there are short worms, long worms, ultra-vibe worms, lizards, ring worms, flukes, finesse worms, shakey head and shakey tail worms, trick worms (no idea what kind of tricks) flap tails, swizzle sticks, dingers, Senko (all the substitute names are in use, sinko, stiko, et). And of course, the frogs, horny toads, rage toads, humpin' (don't go there) toads, money frog, caney toads, all plastics. The realistics include such stalwarts as the BronzeEye frog that pro Dean Rojas has won roughly 17 million in tourney winnings, Kermy frogs, Madd Maxx frogs, Scum frogs and others too numerous to list. You would think that Bass live on a steady diet of frogs.

There are other types of plastics like tubes, some with coffee flavor for the early feeding bass, grubs of all shapes, sizes and colors.

Another hot category from old origins is the super size spoons, as in 5-6". That really is a slab of metal. Useful for snatching bass off deep ledges.

I hardly know where to begin on spinner baits and buzz baits. Just know that they must be the right color (usually white or white/chartreuse) with just the right combination of spinners. For instance on Wednesdays, with cloud cover and in the shady spots one should only use a white/char spinner bait with one #2 Indiana silver blade and a #5 Willow copper blade and 55 strand skirt. Oh yeah, the wire should be vibra-flex titanium with a special rattle attached. On Thursdays you need a whole other combination. BTW on Wednesday if the sun comes out you should switch to a gold colorado #3 and #5 painted willow blade. Just let the fish tell you what they want. (editors note: I have tried on numerous occasions to interview a bass so I could fully understand his reasoning for these subtle changes. I have been told there is an underwater system similar to email that fish use to establish what color worms to bite on a given day.) Buzz Baits are a similar category. Nothing really special here, just use one with an attic fan size buzz spinner that makes lots of noise, leaves a bubble trail and squeaks like a mouse on steroids. But don't give me one more story where the local pro just killed 'em on a buzz bait in the dead of winter with ice forming in the guides and bass exploding on them like hand grenades in the water.

Almost forgot to mention than the well-outfitted angler would only use tungsten worm weights cause they're smaller, denser, feel the bottom and are supplied free to all the pros that use them. You on the other hand are required to take out a small mortgage for a summer's supply and you will cry every time you hang one and break it off. You will break it off using $3 a yard fluorocarbon line which gives you better feel, sinks, is invisible to fish and breaks 5 out 10 times at the knot and also supplied free to the pros. Three breakoffs and one backlash and you will have re-spool another $25 dollars of line.

I cannot deny that the quality and sharpness of hooks is outstanding but they ain't cheap. They have some really weird shapes too.

I noted that the new catalog now has pink tackle bags for the ladies of your life and a nifty Vol Orange Bill Dance bag if you are so inclined. I'm not.

Also new on the horizon are collapsible nets. One is a simple push button and the net comes out of a tube. Only took 8 minutes to collapse it. Another requires one hand to hold the net and another to slide a handle down to open the net. Now if you are alone, you need a reel with a "pause" button on it so the fish will stop and rest while you open the net. Push the button again and the fight is on. If you have a fishing partner be assured he can knock your trophy bass off as well as you.

With the current electronics, the poor fish have little chance to hide from current anglers. For a mere $2500-3000 you can put a new Larry High Def fishfinder, side imaging, down imaging unit that will hunt down and annihilate every fish in the general area. Well, not really annihilate, we do catch and release. The side imaging chart plotter will look on either side of your boat, 150 yards out and pinpoint brush piles, bridges and stray ocean liners all of which supposedly are homes to all sorts of fish. With your GPS you simply mark a way point, navigate to it and catch the fire of fish, IF you are using the right bait, the right color, the right depth, the right retrieve, etc. Just let the fish tell you what you need to know.


Well, I think I have given you enough ammo to limit every time out. You just need to spend roughly $12, 995 on essential equipment (not including a boat). Although I realize you already have $22,000 in equipment now, to be a success you need to buy all this new stuff and replenish old stuff.

Bill Hawkins, fishless in Franklin


I forgot twitch baits, suspending baits, deep divers, medium divers, shallow divers, wake baits, rumba baits, minnow baits, shad baits, crawfish baits and fake trout.

Also, I neglected important methods such as drop shot (or down shot by the Japanese), wacky rigs, jig n worm and a specialty system in the winter on deep clear lakes, float 'n fly. I know there are many that I have left out, perhaps your favorite. Leave a comment.

Bill still fishless in Franklin